10 Jan

Ok. So last week(ish) I was commenting on MTV and how ridiculous it was. Well, here it is, another Saturday and the kids are with their dad, Chris is working and I’m here…alone…watching Made again. Sigh at me. Anyway, today was the “Head to Head Hip Hop Challenge”. As much as I tried, I couldn’t pull myself away from it. These 3 kids from Boston (complete with the retahded accent) were “made” into hip hop dancers. The winner of the competition got $10,000. Can I just add, I would be made into just about anything for $10,000. But these kids, one in particular, whined, and quit, and cried. I’m like, dude. It’s freaking 10 grand. Get over yourself. So about half way through the episode, they get a surprise visit from who else but Soulja Boy! YAYAYAYAYA! Ok, not so much. He’s apparently some gifted song writer who has a “new hit single” called Birdwalk, and it even has it’s own dance. It’s like this whole thing. Anyway, these 3 crybabies are going to be Soulja Boy’s back-up dancers. So he teaches them the “birdwalk”. The birdwalk is a dance that you put your arms up like a muscle man, but you leave your wrists limp, and you stand on one leg and bend the other leg at the knee, putting your foot behind you. You know, like a bird (clever name for the dance, huh?). And you keep doing it over, and over again for 3 and half minutes.

Ok so, they did their performances. All in all not bad for a bunch of white kids trying desperately to get some rhythm. But then it was time for the real treat. Soulja Boy performing his new hit single Birdwalk! Wooohooo! It goes like this, ” wamayo birdwalk wamiyawa birdwalk birdwalk birdwalk over and over again.” For real. But for accuracy’s sake, the actual, honest to God lyrics are, “Watch me hit my bird walk Watch me hit my bird walk Watch me hit my bird walk Watch me hit my bird walk Watch me do it Yuha Watch me do it Yuha Watch me do it Yuha Watch me do it Yuha ” but it doesn’t sound like “watch me”, it sounds like “wamyawa.” So this disturbs me, because I already had nightmares about this crap. I was introduced to the most horrific song ever last year during a cheering competition. All these 9 and 10 year old’s start dancing to “Superman” also by the lyrically gifted Soulja Boy. This one goes, “wamayuuoooo, Soulja Boy, wamayuuoooo, Soulja Boy, wamayuuoooo, Soulja Boy, wamayuuoooo, Soulja Boy” incessently for like 27 minutes. Real lyrics are, “Soulja Boy up In da Hoe Watch Me Crank It Watch Me Roll Watch Me Crank Dat Soulja Boy den Super Man Dat Hoe Now watch me Yuuuuuuuuuuuh (Crank Dat Soulja Boy) Now watch me yuuuuuuuuuuuh (Crank Dat Soulja Boy) Now watch me Yuuuuuuuuuuuh (Crank Dat Soulja Boy) Now watch me Yuuuuuuuuuuuh (Crank Dat Soulja Boy) This is all quite surprising, because I swear he says wamayuuoooo, and I really did look up these lyrics online, and I was so sure he said wamayuuoooo…and I’m usually so good with lyrics, but I suppose it’s easier to understand lyrics if their spoken in English. And now I know that Birdwalk is going to be a new favorite song of the kids. And it sucks. Seriously sucks.

Anyway, the overweight shy kid won, which is nice. I’m thinking of calling Directv and asking them to remove MTV from the channel lineup, because I obviously can’t stop watching it on my own.

By the way, I’m totally downloading Birdwalk and Superman to my ipod. For sucking as much as they do, they’re really catchy.

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